Her: What time did you get up this morning?
Me: About 3.
Her: My god, that’s early – what, did you run 47 miles?
Me: Only 8.
Her: *still staring*
Her: What, that’s it!? You got up that early for 8 miles?
Me: I was going to go 12, but I had to cut it short. I had 10 Taco Bell fire sauces with lunch yesterday. It was burning a hole through me.
Her: 10? That was dumb; you’re disgusting.
Me: Have a good day, I love you too!